Readers, please enjoy this guest blog post by Melissa Cynova, author of Kitchen Table Tarot and the new Tarot Elements.

Most long-time tarot readers get an expression on their face when hearing about a client asking the question, “Will my ex come back?” It’s not an unkind reaction, not “No, they won’t.” It’s more of a, “Dear God, when will people start valuing themselves enough to not long for people who hurt them?”

And yeah, ok, a shortened version of that is, “No, they won’t.”

I’ve given this reading many, many times for many, many questions, and after thirty years, I feel qualified enough to offer advice on this subject.

The answer to this is generally (like 98.7% of the time), either A, B, or C.

  1. No, honey. They’re not coming back. You’re torturing yourself with this hope instead of pointing all of that love and attention where it belongs—on you. Please, please date yourself for six months or so until you are fully healed, shiny, and happy—feet on the ground. If you do this, you’re more likely to pull folks towards you who are also healed, and you can be happy together. Unless you’d rather stay alone, which is awesome indeed.
  2. No, and you don’t want them back. You want the person that you were when you met them back. That person is gone, and they’re not coming back. You are not the same person, and you are the only one who can rebuild yourself.
  3. No. And they’re an asshole and you don’t want them back anyway.

The only time I’ve gotten a Yes—no hyperbole here, total honesty—the person came back, then cheated again and left. Again.

As a reader, it’s important to hold compassion and space for our clients. It’s also really important to be honest. Folks generally break up for a really, really good reason, and those reasons don’t just go away because we miss someone. Sometimes, it’s better to figure out how to be alone than to be with the wrong person. All of the energy that you’ll have to pour back into yourself can truly change your life.

Then, if they do come back, maybe you won’t be there anymore waiting around for them.

Our thanks to Melissa for her guest post! For more from Melissa Cynova, read her article, “Five Ways to Reset Your Life with Tarot.”

Written by Anna
Anna is the editor of Llewellyn's New Worlds of Body, Mind & Spirit, the Llewellyn Journal, and Llewellyn's monthly newsletters. She also blogs, tweets, and helps maintain Llewellyn's Facebook page. In her free time, Anna enjoys crossword puzzles, Jeopardy!, being a grammar geek, and spending time ...